Thursday, December 20, 2012

He's Getting Older

Why does our little ones growing up have to be both amazing and sad? It's not fair. With each passing day I see William getting older. The way he moves, the noises he makes, his personality is just exploding. He's started asking for milk again, using the sign for it. He stopped for a while and while in the car today he made the sign for it. Oh and he decided to give me TWO kisses today. I seriously has tears in my eyes because he NEVER gives me kisses. And his teeth I believe have all finally broken through enough and have stopped paining him. Today and yesterday he only had maybe three tantrums whereas for the past month he's been having these little meltdowns more than ten times a day and I just wanted to scream and pull my hair out.

So eight teeth have all come above the gum line. With luck I shouldn't have to deal with teething again for about another 10 months when his two year molars come in. Oh and today he decided he really wanted to try his hand at eating with a fork and spoon. And he accidentally whistled and tried to do it again but couldn't. And he's getting the hang of calling me mama but right now it only seems to be when he needs my help. Like when he kept putting his mango slice in the cab of his toy bulldozer and couldn't get it out. *sigh* I miss my baby but I do so love the little man he's becoming and it's so great seeing him discover new things and hone his skills.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Quick Update 10-17-12

I can't believe how long it's been since I last posted. Time just got away from me. I'm not going to write down everything because that would take too long. Just an update as to where William's at right now.

Well, he turned 11 months on the 12th and I can't believe it. Hard to believe that last year at this time I was big and pregnant with him and wondering if he'd come early. He's grown some more so now he doesn't really fit his 9 month feetie pjs. I mostly just leave him in whatever onesie I put him in that morning. He's gotten the hang of signing "more" even though he doesn't do it all the time. Mostly he just nods when he wants more, not sure how that happened, but at least I know what he's saying. He's even made a noise that sounded a lot like "more." He also makes noises that sound a lot like thank you and okay. I'd normally just shrug about things like that but he makes those noises when it's relevant so it's pretty odd. But I still say he hasn't said his first word yet. It's a toss up between mama, more, and hi. Which reminds me, he can also wave. He loves to wave.

He loves the game this is how the gentlemen ride. If you start singing it he'll come over and you can pull him into your lap and he'll sit and grab your thumbs like reigns. There's also a monkey dance my sister started with him where she just grabs each hand and raises his arms back and forth making monkey noises to a beat. If you say, "Monkey dance!" he comes over to do it.

Also, he can walk! He took his first steps three days before he turned 10 months. About two weeks before 11 months he had the hang of walking. I say it was due to the big spaces he had to run around in while we were in North Carolina on vacation. And of course now he's trying to run but that makes him fall over.

He's been eating mostly table food for a while now. He will still eat baby food but isn't really interested in it. He likes the rice and meat with veggies toddler meals that Gerber makes. Yesterday he chowed down on some cheesy ravioli. I was surprised because he didn't care for the veggie one and he doesn't really like pasta, but then again, the Gerber ravioli doesn't really have the same consistency as pasta.

At the end of August the daycare he was at gave me a two week notice. They were annoyed they weren't getting as much money for him being there as they wanted. They had him on a full-time enrollment even though he has NEVER been there full-time. They were just getting paid for the two days each week he was there. Apparently that's a big no-no what they did to me and I was told I could file a grievance but I didn't want to bother with that. I pulled him out the day they told me to find another place for him. Luckily my sister was off for a week (it was partly her idea to take him out right then, we were both livid) so she took care of him. It took a few days but I got a new daycare for him. What's ridiculous is that out of a huge list of daycares that daycare assistance gave me, only ten met the criteria I was looking for and out of those only one had any openings. And guess where that daycare is? Three houses down from the guy I was in a serious relationship with for four and a half years. It's very annoying that that's the only daycare that was available, but I really like this one. It's an in-home daycare so William can play with the older kids that are there. The woman has two little shi tzus and William loves them! He actually naps while there, unlike at the other place. And I've never once gone to pick him up and he's screaming and crying. He's always incredibly happy when I get him. The only problem is that I'm not sure he'll be there for years and years, if I'm in Alaska that long. It's just a daycare, it's not a preschool. I would like him to go to preschool. I know that a parent can teach their child anything they are taught in preschool but I barely have time to play with him let alone teaching him things. I mean, yeah I can easily teach him his alphabet and numbers and stuff while I play but I honestly barely have time to do that. I started college at the end of August and I'm going full-time while working part-time. In the mornings before work I'm pumping and then rushing to get some school work done. After work I go get him and come home and work on school work and then he goes to bed at 8pm. If I go to work a bit earlier and get off well before 5pm I go sit at a coffee shop and do my school work until 5pm then go get him and go home. My weekends are my only free days and that's IF I managed to get my work done on time but I usually don't so I'm also stuck doing work then.

Well, I'll leave it at that for now. Hopefully I can update more often.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

No Man

Tonight I'm feeling the lack of a man. And no, not for me, for William. I'm honestly not ready for a relationship right now. I'm still trying to get my time management down pat. I don't have time to give attention to a man. But it would be nice to have a really good male friend who I hung out with a lot and loves kids.

William loves his uncle and is super interested in my mom's husband. Sadly neither man is much interested in William. My mom's husband is a bit of a jerk and while he's loosened up some with William, he still pretty much won't even touch him. My brother-in-law will play with him and sometimes hold him while he's doing something, but for the most part he doesn't have much to do with William. His uncle is whom he sees the most since I live right next door.

My sister and her hubby are trying for their first child but I can tell the guy is still too afraid to actually try hard. He wants children but he's still too grossed out by diaper changes, boogers, and spit-up.

I just want a good man in my son's life who won't let him down. But poor William has a mom like me who doesn't have much confidence and lacks the will power to eat right and exercise. And I don't get out much at all, never have really so there's no chance of me meeting any guy friends even.

I'm hoping going to college will change some of that. I at least want to meet a guy friend. But who knows. If others could see the way William watched his uncle and my mom's husband, you'd understand why it makes me sad there's no man who is really around for him. Hehe, he only has eyes for the men when they're around.

Once, in the grocery store he randomly started waving at guys. This was after I just got done telling my sister that it sucked William didn't wave to strangers.

*sigh* All I can do is hope and pray that I get, at least, a friend.

Saturday, June 23, 2012

First Major Fall

While William has fallen off the bed twice it wasn't a big deal, my bed is low and the floor is carpeted (though knowing a certain story about a baby falling back onto carpeted floor from standing, I still didn't act like it was absolutely nothing). But today he fell on the ground, from my arms.

I was at the lake with a friend and we were getting out of the car and grabbing our things. I got William from his car seat and was shifting him in my arms so I could grab his toy bucket. Well I don't know what happened but I felt his balance shift while I was trying to get him situated and out of my hold he went. Flipped over and fell the roughly three feet to the compacted gravel. He landed on his back, hitting it all at once. I nearly screamed and we both cried a lot. I was shaking so horribly.

I didn't want to rush him to the ER right away, I knew I could watch for signs so I just sat on the sand with him in my lap and texted my sister who is a pediatric nurse. I just had to watch for extreme tiredness, vomiting, unresponsive pupils, and just him not being himself. He was a bit weird at the lake but I think it was just because he'd never been before. He'd never been on sand, he refused to put his feet down when I lifted him up.

After the lake, my friend dropped me off at my mom's and we kept an eye on him there. He was completely normal. Crawling, getting into everything, laughing, squealing. So I'm thinking he's okay. He just has a few red spots on his head and a scratch or two there that I put some bacitracin on.

I'm still so shaken from it all, though. I just wanted to curl up and die when he fell. I really hope it never happens again.

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Teething, Waving, and Standing

While I have a moment and am thinking about it:

William got his first two teeth back in February after he turned three months. They came in within two weeks without much fuss. He just had a harder time sleeping with the tiny bit of pain so I gave him tylenol for his nap and then for bed.

His third tooth came in last month without me really knowing it. I do recall the daycare mentioning to me he's probably teething. I thought he just had allergies because he just had snot everywhere! But two weeks after the runny nose I was letting him chew on my finger like he always does and I happened to feel the third tooth It'd already broken through. So that wasn't much of a bother.

But now! his teething is really getting to him. It's not so bad now because the big one came through on Monday, but he's still a lot more fussy than normal. When he started having the runny nose again I was thinking there may be a tooth on the way. Then I had him laughing and the angle I was holding him allowed me to see his gums and to my horror I saw three spots where teeth were pushing against the gum on top. Add that to the other spot on the bottom where a tooth is biding its time from when the third one came in.

It's no wonder he's been so fussy and clingy lately. I can barely set him down at all. But two of the five have broken through and the next one appears to be the tooth to the left of the top front left tooth (that one is coming down as well but the top front right one is what broke through Monday).

I'll be glad when this is done and I have my content baby back. Well, as content as he normally is. He's a cuddle bug.


The past few days William has been staring at his hand again as it moves. I guess he's going to be right-handed We thought he could be left-handed but he's grown out of doing everything with his left, but we'll see. Well two days he started doing what looked like waving. I mean, it was a pretty good wave, if that's what it was, I wasn't sure. I don't know what the average age for waving is with kids. But then yesterday he did it some more and we figured it definitely was his wave. He doesn't do the open and close hand wave, he does the shake from side to side and it's very deliberate.

It's so cute and I was pretty much feeling like it wasn't fair that I and my family are the only ones who get to see it because while William doesn't have that fear of strangers, he does take a minute or two to warm up because he has to take them in first, especially men since he really only sees two men. Of course right after I mention this to my sister before taking William into the grocery store, I'm busy looking at oatmeal on the breakfast cereal aisle when this guy, maybe in his late twenties with what looked like his little brother, comes walking down the aisle. William sees him and waves at him, holding that arm out as the man passes by. This got a smile from the guy and he waved back. Then William proceeded to wave at almost anyone we passed.

And today, when I got to the daycare, he was playing with -ok this is kind of confusing but bear with me- my mom's friend's step-son's son who was sitting in this thing on the floor and William fell backwards (from his knees). He's just lying there on his back and he sees me and smiles and then waves at me.

I'm hoping this is the beginning of him being able to do sign language because I would love for him to quit whining at me during feeding and also be able to ask me for food or milk. I need to find some other signs, too. All the ones I remember from elementary school are for junk food but that's just what we were taught, haha!


William can crawl on his hands and knees but he still topples forward from time to time and when that happens he moves to the army crawl. He's begun following me to the bathroom or into the kitchen, laughing the whole way. But before he really started going fast, he began wanting to stand up. I've been dealing with him trying to pull himself up using the couch cushions while I'm trying to pump. The couch I have is awful for allowing a baby to pull themselves up so he get pretty aggravated. But he can use his walker to pull himself up or do it while in the pack n play at nana's.

So I looked and looked and finally someone was selling an activity table! Only $10! I just got it last night and he LOVES it! Though he hasn't realized he can use it to stand up himself. The most he does there is get to his knees and play or be really lazy and just sit and reach up.

I'm wondering when he's going to walk. I was nine months and so far he's keeping up with all my milestones as a baby.

Thursday, May 31, 2012


No that's not a typo in the title. I mean, moo. Apparently William really does not like the noise I make when imitating a cow.

I was reading this plush book to him and it has different animals in it. A duck, cow, lion, pig, and a giraffe. After going through it once I decided to go back through and make the noises for the ones that make a noise. He loved the quack since it's a noise I've made to him for months, he always laughs at it. The oinks had him laughing as well. The roar he didn't have any opinion of, but the moo he was none too happy about.

I didn't say, "Moooo." I came as close as I could to making the actual noise, which is something more like miiiir only the r is a lot softer. His eyes started tearing up and turning red around the rim and his mouth twisted into this pitiful O as he started to cry. I stopped and had to hug him close but of course I was laughing. Why the heck is he scared of that?

He's got this cow toy that makes the same noise. You push its nose and it vibrates and moos or vibrates, laughs, then starts playing music. He loves that toy. You think I need to vibrate as I moo at him?

Aaaand He's Off!

Pasting from Facebook as I have only one hand free at the moment:

William crawled!!!!! I was making blueberry coconut protein smoothie in the kitchen and he was playing at the edge of the carpet and I heard him slap the kitchen floor. So I turned and smiled at him then I asked if he was coming to get me. I saw his paci under the couch so I went and picked it up, then stood a few feet away from William and held the pacifier out to him and told him to come get me. He put his hand out and down, then brought a knee forward, then the other hand and the other knee. He did it until he got to me and grabbed his pacifier!!! He finally crawled!!! After about a month of him wobbling around and scooting everywhere he knows how to crawl ^_^

No offense to the woman with her 8-month-old I cashed out at JoAnns the other week but William beat her son by just over a month! :P
 So I know that babies develop at different rates but when I mentioned how long it was taking William to crawl she flapped her hand at me and said, "Yeah he won't crawl for a while now, mine didn't at 6 months."

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

It Had To Happen & Six Month Well Check

William fell off the bed a few hours ago. First time he's done that. Don't know why I didn't think to move him further from the edge. I was busy taping down the tin foil that had come up on the window (cheaper than black out curtains) and he was playing on the bed and I guess he went after the phone charger cord that was in a pile of stuffed animals next to the bed and down he went. I'm hoping he hit the animals and rolled to the floor, though the thump was pretty hard I guess it could have been like that if it was a fast roll down the mountain of plushies.

I picked him up right away and he stopped crying so I guess it didn't hurt him too much. But I will be keeping an eye out for any off behavior.


William had his 6 month well check last Friday. It's a bit late but oh well. He weighs 18lbs 10oz, head circumference is 18", body length is 27" (maybe 27.5). He's around the 50th percentile, whatever that means. All I know is that he's right where he should be considering how much he weighed at birth.

He had two shots that day and I wasn't looking forward to them but I was really surprised with how well he handled them. The first time he cried and I nursed him and the next day he wasn't feeling well at all. The next time he cried for a few minutes. I don't remember if he'd had shots each time, blah. But this last time he cried for a few seconds and was fine. Wasn't even grumpier than normal the next day. So proud of him! ^_^

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Kisses and Bouncing

I'll eventually get to the update haha. As for now, though, yesterday was a very cute day for William. First, I put him in his jumper in hopes of wearing him out more before his nap. It worked wonders! I happened to look over at one point and saw his head loll to the side and his eyes go back into his head as he began to pass out. He jerked back awake then bounced some and began to pass out again. It was too cute! So I got up and pulled him from it and as soon as he was in my arms he was out. Put him on the bed and he did wake up  few times but went right back to sleep. He barely moves when sleeping so putting him on the far side of the bed near the corner is okay, especially since my bed is a king size.

After his nap my sister came over while our landlord's husband was about to put an exhaust fan in above her stove. She decided to help sort out William's clothes so we could figure out what to keep. We got a huge pile of it together and my sister thought it'd be fun to put William on the pile.

Later that night I was feeding him some sweet potatoes and decided to ask for  kiss. He put his forehead to mine. I asked a few more times with the same result. Apparently he thinks kissing means touching foreheads haha!

Monday, May 21, 2012

Toy Bucket

I'll make an update post later but as for right now here's something I just posted to Facebook:

William loves his toy bucket. Every morning I lay him on the floor and change his diaper near the bucket and when I'm done he rolls over and immediately grabs it and pulls it over, dumping out all his toys. Today, however, instead of playing with the toys, he's playing with the bucket! Chasing it all over the living room. It rolled onto the kitchen floor a bit go and he laid at the edge of the living room where carpet meets linoleum and stared at his bucket. He kept running his hand over the linoleum so I got up and set his bucket back on the carpet, but far enough away that he'd have to go after it. Hehe.
 He can't crawl yet but he can sure scoot around. If he really wants something he's pretty fast with his sort of army crawl.

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Back to Front

Before I forget and while I have the time I want to quickly document that William rolled over from back to front for the second time! The first time was in mid March. Hehe I'm excited! He seemed pretty pleased with himself. Next is crawling! He already does those little movements with his legs, sticking his butt in the air haha!

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Bedtime Tonight

The little booger is in his swing. He better sleep well tonight because he got up at 9:30am and had about an hour and a half nap from 11:30am to 1:19pm. And for some reason he was totally fine with not eating from about 2pm to 7pm. I don't understand it. But now he's fed and asleep. What I hate, though is that it takes me so long to be ready to feed him. I don't get it. He eats about every 3-4 hours and yet I'm barely ready for him. Blah. Anyways I hope he sleeps well tonight. He slept almost 8 hours straight last night. I did wake him up to eat sometime before midnight but he didn't wake up all the way and he went right back to sleep after and slept until about 3:45am then went back to bed until about 6am and I got him back to sleep and eh got up for the day three hours later. Hmm.

Saturday, February 11, 2012

More on FOB

I took William to see his dad and brother today. William was a happy little guy and his brother enjoyed getting to see him. He was in the back of the car with William saying, "I got what I wanted; a little brother!" Really cute!

I didn't spend much time there because it took me so long to get ready (thanks to the new haircut, which I love but can't understand why it's so poofy for me but was flat for the hairdresser) seeing FOB was cutting into William's nap time. Poor little guy hasn't had a good schedule the last few days. I'm really hoping he'll get to have a normal nap tomorrow. Not sure, though since there's church and then we have to stop by the store.

When we got home after leaving FOB's I took a few picture of William because he was really cute with his shirt covering half his face while sleeping and then peeking out over the top of it when he woke up. FOB texted back laughing and calling William a junior creeper because the peeking picture really did look just a bit creepy. Then he thanked me for bringing William over and said it was nice to have everyone together.

He's been doing pretty well lately when it comes to just the way he acts in general. He's actually been trying to get me to have lunch with him so he can see William more often but I've been so busy this week. The fact that he's been asking really says something.

I talked to him a bit about what's going on in his life lately. He told me the other day that he's taken a safety course and will be taking a structural welding class at the end of this month so he can work on the north slope. Today he mentioned he's going to be taking a daddy class to help him be a better parent. He really wants to do better by his children and make sure he can teach them well and not impart anything bad on them. He wants to have this good job and get his own place and everything. And I know when he has regular money he'll be asking me if I need anything. When he gets some extra cash lately he does ask me if I need anything.

I won't be doing child support but we have the understanding that if I really need something for William and he has the money I can ask him to get it. I find that's a better way to do things rather than just take his money when he has it.

All this new stuff with him is really nice. I'm hoping it continues and he can really make a change in his life. I would like to see him happy. I've never figured he's a bad person. He's just so turned around and he knows it. I'll be praying that he continues trying to make things better for himself and that he continues trying to be a good parent.


On another note, William desperately wants to sit up. While awake in his swing or in his bouncy chair, he tries to sit forward so he's actually sitting up and not reclined. It's really cute and I feel bad that he can't really do it yet. But he'll get there.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012


Hmm I think a little color might be nice. I wish I was more tech/html/whatever savvy so I could make the blog look nice but I'm only slightly above average when it comes to anything on the computer. I have a livejournal and the preset stuff I picked out I really like. Wish Blogspot's stuff was better.

Anyway the point to this post. So William will be 3 months in four days. He has been cooing, smiling, laughing, lifting his head during tummy time, focusing on objects and following them, and now I can add rolling over and getting his index and middle fingers into his mouth to the list.

Yesterday (February 7, 2012) William rolled over for the first time. He was having his tummy time and watching TV (the best time to do tummy time because he wants to lift his head to see the screen) and he lifted his left arm like he was reaching for something and just rolled onto his back! I happened to be filming it with my cell phone because I was amazed at how long he was hodlding his head up. He's been able to hold it up for several minutes.

Today he rolled over again. He did have a little bit of help from his aunt but I'm sure he would have done it on his own eventually.

Here's the video I got of it today:

I think the next milestone will be him discovering that his feet are actually his and will do his bidding, haha! He's taken to staring at them for a few minutes each day. He seems pretty fascinated in them.

I would like to add more videos and I have plenty to put up but a lot are either on my phone or on the video camera. My phone is only able (supposedly but I have yet to get it to do right) download things from the computer to the phone, not from the phone to the computer. In order to get the videos off the phone I'd have to send them to my mom or brother-in-law because they have iPhones and can e-mail me the videos. As for the video camera ones, I have to wait for my middle sister to put the videos on a disc and then I can rip the stuff off the disc onto my computer and then upload to the internet.

The videos I have on YouTube are ones taken with my mom's computer, which has a built in webcam (my webcam's mic won't work properly for some reason). Here's the other YouTube video:

I hope to have more videos to put up soon.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Two Month Shots

January 30, 2011 William had his two month appointment. He is now 14lbs 14oz and 22in long. They say he is above average for weight gain and below average for growth. All that matters to me is that he is healthy.

The nurse went through the normal deal, asking me questions and such about William's feeding, sleeping, etc. When she got to his bowel movements I asked her about the fact that it can take him a while once he starts trying to pass gas or go poo and he strains and yet he doesn't have solid stools. She seemed to think that meant something but she never said. When the doctor asked about that and I told him, he did the same thing. I'm a bit peeved. I'd like to make things easier for my baby because it wakes him up often.

The doctor had to pull some of his skin back on William's penis. William did very well with that and any time he cried out the doctor stopped. Luckiy the cries were because of boredom, not pain. And though I continue to pull the skin back myself (though not as much as the doctor did because it's not something a regular person should do) I fear the skin has just gone right back. The doctor didn't even get it all so he said we'll work on it again at the next appointment.

Then came the shots. I wasn't as emotional as I thought I'd be. That was good because the poor little man cried hard. I nursed him when it was done and he fell asleep. The rest of that day he did fine. It wasn't until 3:30am that he began feeling bad.

So Tuesday wasn't a fun day for my baby. I let him nurse whenever he wanted and just catered to him. By Wednesday he was good again and today he's even better! That's all over with now and I'm not going to think about the next appointment until I get the reminder in the mail.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Giggles and Sleep

Took William to see his dad and brother today. His brother really loves him, it's cute. It's the first time he got to be around William while he was wide awake and "talking." William did well but did get hungry after an hour so I had to leave since I didn't have stuff for him. I did it that way on purpose. I'm not fond of hanging out at FOB's place. The smell brings back bad feelings and we are always in his room so FOB can play video games.

After I got back home I fed William and then was pumping, playing with, talking, and reading to him. While I was just talking to him I paused for a moment to check the computer and when I turned back to him it startled him. His eyes widened and he and jumped, then giggled. It was a full on giggle. No dry cough or squeal. It was incredibly cute! I tried to get him to do it again but I couldn't. I hope I get to hear more real soon.

Once I was done I brought him out into the kitchen/sitting area/dining room and set him in his bouncy chair while everyone and I ate. During this time, my mom's hubby's sister-in-law asked to hold William and I said sure. So she goes and picks him up then brings him back to the table and is talking to him and letting him look around. Then she has him facing her, laying against her shoulder and she's rubbing in big circles over his lower back and butt. Within minutes he's fast asleep. I couldn't believe it. The only time he falls asleep while someone is sitting down with him is when he's nursing and I'm in the TV room.

After all that she asked where to put him to bed and I showed her. As soon as she set him in his swing he started crying. She shushed him while I grabbed the womb sounds bear, hoping it would help. I set it down and she took it and laid it tummy to tummy on William and said, "Now he thinks it's you." He went back to sleep within a few minutes. I'm still shocked by it all. I never thought of putting the bear on him or right next to him. Rubbing his back never worked because he's ticklish there so he just spazzes out. But I'm going to try this tomorrow and see if it works and if it keeps wokring while they're here, I'll try it again after they leave and see if it works. Hopefully it does. He's now in bed a full hour before I've been putting him to bed all week!

I really love my son ^_^

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Update *Jan. 25, 2012*

**Yes some thing are repeated from the Jan 12th update. I'd forgotten I'd written it then had to save it while tending to William. Had to put this post on hold as well since he got up from a nap while I was writing it.**

So things are going. Pretty much everything is what you would expect with a new baby and a single mom. Here's the milestones and little cute things that have happened so far:

William used to smile only in his sleep. He now smiles quite readily for a na-na-na-na noise or a smooch noise. Unfortunately I do not remember when he first smiled while awake. He still has not gotten the hang of laughing- either that or this is just his laugh. His laugh is a dry, fake cough noise sometimes ended with a small squeal. Usually when he laughs he pulls his hands to his mouth, as fists, scrunched everything up and turns to one side or the other. It's absolutely adorable! His first attempt at laughing came on the evening of December 25th. I might've mentioned it in the last post but I don't remember.

He has been making 'ah,' 'oo,' and 'goo' noises for several weeks now and has only recently begun to copy me if I make them, but not all the time. When awake, you can usually find him with one or both fists at his mouth, drool running down them. The rule goes: if it's in his hands, it's in his mouth, haha! He still has not noticed his hands or feet, though. I'm not sure when babies are supposed to do that.

Last week was when he finally started to like his play mat. He especially loves the mirror and a purple, white-spotted butterfly my mom bought him (part of  a three-piece set that also has a bumblebee and a ladybug). He kicks like there's no tomorrow while on the mat and will sometimes "talk" to the butterfly or his image. As for his bouncy seat, he's liking it a lot more (especially since I put the mirror and the butterfly on the hanging thing) and will sit in it at least long enough for me to do a load of dishes, which is all I ask. Well, that and maybe for him to be content long enough for me to make a quick meal.

He has not rolled over yet, but I'm thinking he will before the warmer weather arrives in the end of March. He's started to roll to his side now. During tummy time he can hold his head up nice and high for a bit but usually only when you set him in front of the TV for tummy time.

William LOVES the TV. He'll watch anything right now. My mom just got him some educational stuff so that way he will get some learning in, which is good. He got to see Sesame Street for a little bit for the first time today. We were up early enough for it. Normally he doesn't get any PBS stuff in until 1pm and then it's Caillou or Dinosaur Train or Clifford. But since he didn't get much sleep last night he fell asleep halfway through Sesame Street, but he really seemed to like it. Luckily he was out well before Elmo's World.

When we get up in the morning (which is when William fidgets from trying to get stuff through his tummy too much and wakes himself up) I'll feed him. During this session I'll check things on the computer and several times I'll look down and see him grinning at me real big so his mouth is open and he's got this mischievous look in his eye, like he just farted or something, haha. It's really too cute and I'd like to get a picture of it someday. He'll use that look to get what he wants, I just know it.

He has outgrown any full body onesies that say 0-3 months because the feet are too small for him. So I've put them all in a bag, along with some other 0-3 month things that don't fit him for one reason or the other. Now he is in either plain old 3 month clothing or 3-6 month things. He has a few 6 month full body onesies he wears. I just put socks on him to keep his feet from sliding out of the feetie part, the socks add some drag so the things go with his movements. He's a big boy!

As for the bad parts William can be a handful to get to sleep at night. During the day he usually has no problems being put down for a nap, as long as I hold him and pat his back and sing to him a bit before putting him in his swing. He still won't sleep in his pack n play. I'm hoping I can get him used to it before I have to work and he has to go to daycare.

Most of the time I can't find the time to do anything because William doesn't want to be set down. He's such a cuddle monster, which is nice and cute but since it's just me it does tend to drive me mad. My mom used to take him for about an hour in the evening since she didn't get to see him all day but she's stopped doing that unless I ask her and lately she gets home late so I just keep him with me. Even during his naps I don't get to do much. There's no telling how he's going to nap. He goes back and forth between cat naps and long ones so if I want to do something like take a shower while he naps I have to make it a super quick one. I can't relax and stand in the water just to warm up. I have to get in, wet my hair, lather it, rinse it, then wash my body and get out.

The other night my mom brought home a box of rice cereal for me to try on him. We tried it and put him down at 8pm. I decided to go to bed at midnight, which was when his next feeding would be if he stayed asleep long enough. He did and it was the BEST four hours I've had since before he was born! I got to just sit in the TV and watch whatever without having to pause it multiple times (watching Netflix) so I can get him soothed during a fidgety session or to go feed him cause he hungry before three hours are up. I could type with both hands on the computer, I could make a meal without hoping he'd sit in his bouncy chair long enough or without having him in one arm.

Last week Friday I was really feeling the single mother thing. Sometimes I just wish I had a partner who could take over for a little bit so I could get things done. Someone who could help me clean, help keep William entertained, take over getting him to bed, go get him when he wakes up from naps, etc. I also hadn't been out of the house and into town in a week. It was my mom's birthday and her hubby was taking her out. I was at home, alone, with William on a Friday night. All I had to do was think about how I was stuck at home again and all the bad things that were weighing on me like work and not having some help.

My best friend moved back from the lower 48. She and her fiance split and since she was moving here now she would need to look for a job. I thought it would be great for her and I to go out and put in applications and whatnot together. And it would was a nice thought that she was single, too. I mean, don't get me wrong, I hate that she and her guy are having problems, but you know how it is. I didn't feel like such a loser now. And I thought with her hanging out with me and us putting in applications, I'd be more likely to get a job. The whole motivation thing.

Next thing I know she's got her old job back and she's dating this guy she knows who lives in California. She visited him before coming up here and he visited for a bit after Christmas. Now I feel like even more of a loser than I did before. I've been single (sort of) for four years now and last year I was putting in tons of applications and not getting a single nibble.

So with everything on my mind like that and just wishing I could have my hands free for a few hours I was pretty depressed. It was gone by the net day, though, but I still don't like feeling like that. I love  William to pieces and it's not his fault I ran out of gas and so was stuck inside for days and days.

I tried getting out today. I was going to have a friend of mine (who is also a single mom and I don't know how she keeps sane since she doesn't work and has absolutely no help from her family) come to get my little gas can to fill it up while I watched her kid. So when William went to sleep I was outside trying to get the can from my trunk. Wouldn't you know it, the trunk was frozen shut (and still is).

So, even though I knew there'd be none, I went into the garage hoping my mom's husband had a small, empty, spare gas can. Lo and behold right next to the door was the one he normally keeps in his car and he always keeps gas in it. Woo hoo!

Went back to the car, took the lid off the gas tank and then went to take the cap off the can and couldn't get it. He'd tightened it too tight. My coat sleeve has this rubber thing on it that has velcro on it so I can tighten the sleeve around my wrist and I tried utilizing that but it just didn't work. Back to the garage I went, with the gas can, hoping there was one of those large wrenches but I couldn't find one. I did, however, find some leather work gloves on the jig saw, so I tried one of those and it worked!

Back at the car, putthe gas in, then I made sure the car was plugged in and the power to the outlet was on and I went inside to wait. About an hour later I went back outside and tried starting the car. Not so much as a click. The battery was comepletely dead. To the garage. My mom's husband has a portable jumper but I knew he usually keeps it in his car instead of using jumper cables. I had hoped he'd left it in the garage. All I found, though, was a charger. So I tried that.

While it was hooked up and charging my battery I went back inside and checked things. After a bit I went back outside and tried starting the car and things clicked, lights blinked, etc. but nothing started. Then I remembered he has the thing set so a battery charges slowly. So I just took the thing off and put it back in the garage. Tomorrow he'll probably help me get everything done so I can get the car started. I've got to have it up and running for Friday when my mom needs me to drive in behind her so she can take her truck in to be serviced and then her, William, and I are going to go do things!

So I won't get out of the house until Friday. I'll have been stuck at home for two weeks then.

But! the awesome thing I just found out two days ago is that my middle sister, Christina, is coming up to take a class in town! She said she'll be here for a week or two! I'm incredibly excited! The class starts February 2nd so she'll be here sometime next week before then.  Her hubby is getting the ticket tomorrow. I would love it if she was going to be here on Monday! Or heck, even Sunday!! Before Once Upon a Time comes on would be awesome! Haha, as you can see I love Christina tons. I honestly don't know ow I get by without her around. We shared a room for 12 or 13 years and she's only two years older than me. I really shouldn't depend on her so much, but I can't help it.

She said she'd babysit some while she's here, which will be nice. I know I could ask FOB to babysit but the very thought of it send me into an anxiety attack. When I watch Parenthood, the people on that show sometimes get to yelling at each other and William gets upset by it. I couldn't let FOB watch William until he's old enough to understand his dad's anger problems. Not only that but I expect that if FOB watched William, he'd probably take him to his friend's house where his son lives (his best friend is married to his ex) and that place is a mad house. When I was there a few weeks ago, I was stressed out. The couple is aggressive, just like FOB, and they're having a rough patch in their marriage so they're constantly arguing. I don't want William anywher near that. He's got a really peaceful place with me.

So I deal but I can't wait for Tina to get here! I know she said she'll babysit but for the most part I'll just have her take over when I want my hands free and all. I can't really spend much time with my best friend since she works now and she only has one day off a week.

Guess that about does it. I put William to bed in his swing after a little bit of rice cereal with breastmilk and then some extra nursing. Not sure if I'll pump or just get him from his swing and let him nurse in the bed. I really hope he sleeps well tonight.

Update 1-12-2012

William is two months old today! I haven't been able to post anything on here because when I get time where I don't have him in my arms I have to either nap, clean, shower, etc. When I have him I've got one hand free and that's really hard to type things up so I stick with making short replies to whatever.

Right now he's taking another nap. I think he's going through a growth spurt. He just got up from a nap a little over an hour ago. That nap was about 3 hours. I felt bad for putting him in his swing while he's up instead of interacting with him but I was busy trying to eat. I had him on his play mat watching TV (he LOVES watching TV and movies) and when he got fussy there I set him in my lap while I ate but he got fussy after about 10 minutes. So I set him in his swing. I didn't want to, but what else could I do? He fussed for a minute and then sat there watching TV or staring at the bed, which told me he was tired. When he just stares into space I know he needs sleep. And now he's asleep. I should go take a shower but I really wanna update, haha!

So, like I said, he loves watching TV and movies. I took him to the movies the other week to see The Muppets. He did wonderful! He gave a small cry in the first five minutes so I took him from the carrier and nursed him, then sat him in my lap. He watched pretty much all of the movie. I just kept switching him from knee to knee or the center of my lap. I played with his arms and whisper talked to him or let him look out at the seats behind me. He didn't make a single noise until the credits rolled. I doubt he'll be so content to watch a movie again until he's a few years old. It was a fun little outing.

He makes noises now. He started about three weeks ago, maybe four. They all kind of blur together and his cooing came on so slowly that I can't really pinpoint a date. He talks most while I read to him and it's so adorable the faces he makes when talking. He also sticks his tongue out and makes bubbles, hehe ^_^ On December 25th he started trying to laugh. He hasn't quite gotten the hang of it yet but I know when he's laughing. It comes out as this kind of dry cough. He will also squeal from time to time.

The Christmas tree and the ceiling fan in the sitting room are his favorite things in the house. They get his attention and can keep him from crying for a good while. It'll be sad when the tree is put away.