Sunday, January 6, 2013

William and My Weight

Some more on the update front about my lovely little man. He's been feeding himself for several months now but only last month did he decide he wanted to feed himself with a utensil. He's does pretty well for his age, I suppose, not really sure what's considered doing well and doing poorly. He does make quite a bit of mess, but that's to be expected. It's also nice to see him beginning to eat some meat. I was at a loss as to what to give him that would give him protein for a good while since he's now getting cow's milk and hasn't had a bottle of breastmilk for about a week now. Then my mom reminded me about Greek yogurt and I remembered that it was a great source of protein when I was on my gestational diabetes diet so I bought a big container of it and he loves that. I won't push meat on him until he's good any ready but I do offer it to him.

He's eaten an egg but it's hard to get him to eat it again. He won't even try it but I know he likes it. He ate the one because my sister managed to pop a tiny piece in his mouth when he had it open, laughing. But after that one egg he still won't eat it right away. Yesterday we let him try a piece of hamburger from McDonald's. I really don't care to give him fast food but I must admit I have given him fries from time to time because I am bad and have fast food myself. If you've ever had kids you know how they are, they want what you're eating so it was either give him a fry or drive myself insane with his whining and screaming. Believe me it's not something I'm going to give in to all of the time. But it shouldn't be so bad since I'm trying to change my eating habits. No fast food, no soda for starters. I'm happy to say that he has NEVER had soda. I grew up on the stuff and I'd much rather him have french fries from McDonald's or Wendy's than soda. Well other than that the only meat he really eats is chicken nuggets. He's had some from a local restaurant here and I make homemade ones that I much prefer over any fast food or restaurant ones. Oddly enough, though, he won't touch chicken if you hand him some from a breast, just chunks in chicken nugget form.

But he's a pretty good eater other than meat. Oh! Beans. That's the form of protein I was giving him before I remembered yogurt. He loooves beans because he can feed himself with his fingers and he probably likes the taste, haha.

Well, on to my first weight loss post.

I checked my weight this morning on an empty stomach. 222.8lbs, which means I've lost two pounds in the last week, yay! I did start controlling my portions some and since I'm broke and finally got my food stamps done up I've been making it a point to cook dinner. Since I'm not working and still on Christmas break from school I have the time. Course, school starts on the 17th so I'm planning on putting together some crock pot meals and make-ahead freezer meals so on days I go to school I can easily get something done.

Anyways, I haven't measured myself yet, I'll do that tonight when I make my food diary post. Oh and I have a nifty scale that calculates body fat percentage, too. Sad, and embarrassing, to say that I am 4% away from being half fat but the good thing about it is that I am 4% below being half fat!! Yay! I was scared I'd be over 50%. I don't know what's a good percentage of fat for a woman so I'm not really going to look at that except to help me out when I feel like I haven't lost enough by seeing if I lost fat and gained muscle.

So the big goal is to be at least 140lbs by September. September is the month I realized I was actually thin back when I was 16 and losing weight the first time. I mean I saw the scale and all but I rarely bought any clothes and never much paid attention to the size during that period until my mom took me shopping for all new outfits. Really I don't even care about the weight. I care about the size. I mean I'm the same size I was at 193lbs but I'm 222lbs, so you see it's stupid to focus on weight, instead focus on your pant size.

So 140lbs and a size 9 is what I want to be. I'm tempted to go a little further and see how I look as a size 6 but we'll see about that when I reach my goal of a size 9. I loved the way I looked as a 9 because I was thin but I was soft. I had fat in all the right places and I looked healthy, I wasn't even self-conscious about the way I looked even though I still had a bit of a belly roll because I wasn't toned. But I'll be working on toning throughout this time because the pregnancy stretched out my stomach and the water weight made my arms balloon and they haven't exactly recovered.

But that's just my long-term goal. I'm going to set short term goals as well. Monthly I'd like to lose between 10-15lbs and weekly around 2-3lbs. Those are safe. I don't know anything about losing inches so while I'll keep track of that either every week or every month it's not something that I'm going to say, "I want to lose this many inches in this amount of time."

And with that, day one is begun.

Quick Update and More

William is quite the handful. He's been climbing on things a lot lately and even moving stuff to tables and counters in order to climb on it to reach food. He drank out of a plain old cup without spilling anything (did that several times with the same drink), he can now sign "please" and even made a two word sentence with his signs saying, "More, please," when I asked him if he'd like more chips the other day. He's got all his teeth he's supposed to have in now (well maybe more so because they say that at 9 months a baby is only supposed to have two teeth but William had eight and now he has all four front teeth, all four eye teeth, and all four if his 1 year molars). And there's loads more but I should really be getting to bed since it's 2:45am.

First, though, I want to say I'm hijacking this blog for my weight loss stuff. I've needed to lose weight for a few years now and keep getting sidetracked with delicious food or crazy men. It's January and this is the month I started in when I began my first ever successful weight loss. I was 16 years old, 193lbs, and a size 18. Right now I'm 25 years old, 224lbs, and a size 18 (and no that's not a lie or vanity sizing, I have jeans from when I was 16 before I lost the weight and after being washed they fit perfectly, I'm more muscular than the average woman). Pre-pregnancy I was 230lbs. By the time I was due to be induced I was 253lbs. When I finally went back to work when William was 5 months I was 205lbs (weight gain from going from a house that has money to buy the good food and more of a schedule so meals were prepared daily to a place where I'm broke half the time and thanks to work and school and William I barely have time to do anything else). When I was 16 and lost weight I went from the weight and size I mentioned above to 142lbs and a size 9. A size 9 is considered on the bigger size of skinny. For me it was perfect. As soon as I reached that weight I stopped all the good things I was doing like eating right and exercising. Luckily my portion control was doing well and the only reason I gained anything back was because of depression eating.

So I've done it before, I know what I need to do, but now I just need to do it. I also saw someone else's blog with a weight loss challenge and part of it was to adopt two good habits. I'm thinking for me, this is going to be getting to bed at a decent hour and moisturizing my face at least every night but I will do it in the morning if I have time. My mom says it looks like I have rosacea and part of that is dry skin that won't sluff off like it's supposed to so I have rough patches on my face and I found with daily moisturizing (putting a good layer of cream on and leaving it there for 30 minutes) it helps a lot and I have baby soft skin ^_^

I will post tomorrow what my weight is (I'm thinking it's going to be more than 224lbs, that's just what I remember from when I weighed myself the week before this past one). I'll also take measurements. I'll even keep a food diary. I'm planning on going on a diabetic diet of sorts. Pretty much just using the guidelines from my gestational diabetes diet but with less calories (though I'm not really going to be counting them, just eating right and portion control because that's all you really need along with exercise).

Anyways that's all until tomorrow morning.

Thursday, December 20, 2012

He's Getting Older

Why does our little ones growing up have to be both amazing and sad? It's not fair. With each passing day I see William getting older. The way he moves, the noises he makes, his personality is just exploding. He's started asking for milk again, using the sign for it. He stopped for a while and while in the car today he made the sign for it. Oh and he decided to give me TWO kisses today. I seriously has tears in my eyes because he NEVER gives me kisses. And his teeth I believe have all finally broken through enough and have stopped paining him. Today and yesterday he only had maybe three tantrums whereas for the past month he's been having these little meltdowns more than ten times a day and I just wanted to scream and pull my hair out.

So eight teeth have all come above the gum line. With luck I shouldn't have to deal with teething again for about another 10 months when his two year molars come in. Oh and today he decided he really wanted to try his hand at eating with a fork and spoon. And he accidentally whistled and tried to do it again but couldn't. And he's getting the hang of calling me mama but right now it only seems to be when he needs my help. Like when he kept putting his mango slice in the cab of his toy bulldozer and couldn't get it out. *sigh* I miss my baby but I do so love the little man he's becoming and it's so great seeing him discover new things and hone his skills.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Quick Update 10-17-12

I can't believe how long it's been since I last posted. Time just got away from me. I'm not going to write down everything because that would take too long. Just an update as to where William's at right now.

Well, he turned 11 months on the 12th and I can't believe it. Hard to believe that last year at this time I was big and pregnant with him and wondering if he'd come early. He's grown some more so now he doesn't really fit his 9 month feetie pjs. I mostly just leave him in whatever onesie I put him in that morning. He's gotten the hang of signing "more" even though he doesn't do it all the time. Mostly he just nods when he wants more, not sure how that happened, but at least I know what he's saying. He's even made a noise that sounded a lot like "more." He also makes noises that sound a lot like thank you and okay. I'd normally just shrug about things like that but he makes those noises when it's relevant so it's pretty odd. But I still say he hasn't said his first word yet. It's a toss up between mama, more, and hi. Which reminds me, he can also wave. He loves to wave.

He loves the game this is how the gentlemen ride. If you start singing it he'll come over and you can pull him into your lap and he'll sit and grab your thumbs like reigns. There's also a monkey dance my sister started with him where she just grabs each hand and raises his arms back and forth making monkey noises to a beat. If you say, "Monkey dance!" he comes over to do it.

Also, he can walk! He took his first steps three days before he turned 10 months. About two weeks before 11 months he had the hang of walking. I say it was due to the big spaces he had to run around in while we were in North Carolina on vacation. And of course now he's trying to run but that makes him fall over.

He's been eating mostly table food for a while now. He will still eat baby food but isn't really interested in it. He likes the rice and meat with veggies toddler meals that Gerber makes. Yesterday he chowed down on some cheesy ravioli. I was surprised because he didn't care for the veggie one and he doesn't really like pasta, but then again, the Gerber ravioli doesn't really have the same consistency as pasta.

At the end of August the daycare he was at gave me a two week notice. They were annoyed they weren't getting as much money for him being there as they wanted. They had him on a full-time enrollment even though he has NEVER been there full-time. They were just getting paid for the two days each week he was there. Apparently that's a big no-no what they did to me and I was told I could file a grievance but I didn't want to bother with that. I pulled him out the day they told me to find another place for him. Luckily my sister was off for a week (it was partly her idea to take him out right then, we were both livid) so she took care of him. It took a few days but I got a new daycare for him. What's ridiculous is that out of a huge list of daycares that daycare assistance gave me, only ten met the criteria I was looking for and out of those only one had any openings. And guess where that daycare is? Three houses down from the guy I was in a serious relationship with for four and a half years. It's very annoying that that's the only daycare that was available, but I really like this one. It's an in-home daycare so William can play with the older kids that are there. The woman has two little shi tzus and William loves them! He actually naps while there, unlike at the other place. And I've never once gone to pick him up and he's screaming and crying. He's always incredibly happy when I get him. The only problem is that I'm not sure he'll be there for years and years, if I'm in Alaska that long. It's just a daycare, it's not a preschool. I would like him to go to preschool. I know that a parent can teach their child anything they are taught in preschool but I barely have time to play with him let alone teaching him things. I mean, yeah I can easily teach him his alphabet and numbers and stuff while I play but I honestly barely have time to do that. I started college at the end of August and I'm going full-time while working part-time. In the mornings before work I'm pumping and then rushing to get some school work done. After work I go get him and come home and work on school work and then he goes to bed at 8pm. If I go to work a bit earlier and get off well before 5pm I go sit at a coffee shop and do my school work until 5pm then go get him and go home. My weekends are my only free days and that's IF I managed to get my work done on time but I usually don't so I'm also stuck doing work then.

Well, I'll leave it at that for now. Hopefully I can update more often.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

No Man

Tonight I'm feeling the lack of a man. And no, not for me, for William. I'm honestly not ready for a relationship right now. I'm still trying to get my time management down pat. I don't have time to give attention to a man. But it would be nice to have a really good male friend who I hung out with a lot and loves kids.

William loves his uncle and is super interested in my mom's husband. Sadly neither man is much interested in William. My mom's husband is a bit of a jerk and while he's loosened up some with William, he still pretty much won't even touch him. My brother-in-law will play with him and sometimes hold him while he's doing something, but for the most part he doesn't have much to do with William. His uncle is whom he sees the most since I live right next door.

My sister and her hubby are trying for their first child but I can tell the guy is still too afraid to actually try hard. He wants children but he's still too grossed out by diaper changes, boogers, and spit-up.

I just want a good man in my son's life who won't let him down. But poor William has a mom like me who doesn't have much confidence and lacks the will power to eat right and exercise. And I don't get out much at all, never have really so there's no chance of me meeting any guy friends even.

I'm hoping going to college will change some of that. I at least want to meet a guy friend. But who knows. If others could see the way William watched his uncle and my mom's husband, you'd understand why it makes me sad there's no man who is really around for him. Hehe, he only has eyes for the men when they're around.

Once, in the grocery store he randomly started waving at guys. This was after I just got done telling my sister that it sucked William didn't wave to strangers.

*sigh* All I can do is hope and pray that I get, at least, a friend.

Saturday, June 23, 2012

First Major Fall

While William has fallen off the bed twice it wasn't a big deal, my bed is low and the floor is carpeted (though knowing a certain story about a baby falling back onto carpeted floor from standing, I still didn't act like it was absolutely nothing). But today he fell on the ground, from my arms.

I was at the lake with a friend and we were getting out of the car and grabbing our things. I got William from his car seat and was shifting him in my arms so I could grab his toy bucket. Well I don't know what happened but I felt his balance shift while I was trying to get him situated and out of my hold he went. Flipped over and fell the roughly three feet to the compacted gravel. He landed on his back, hitting it all at once. I nearly screamed and we both cried a lot. I was shaking so horribly.

I didn't want to rush him to the ER right away, I knew I could watch for signs so I just sat on the sand with him in my lap and texted my sister who is a pediatric nurse. I just had to watch for extreme tiredness, vomiting, unresponsive pupils, and just him not being himself. He was a bit weird at the lake but I think it was just because he'd never been before. He'd never been on sand, he refused to put his feet down when I lifted him up.

After the lake, my friend dropped me off at my mom's and we kept an eye on him there. He was completely normal. Crawling, getting into everything, laughing, squealing. So I'm thinking he's okay. He just has a few red spots on his head and a scratch or two there that I put some bacitracin on.

I'm still so shaken from it all, though. I just wanted to curl up and die when he fell. I really hope it never happens again.

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Teething, Waving, and Standing

While I have a moment and am thinking about it:

William got his first two teeth back in February after he turned three months. They came in within two weeks without much fuss. He just had a harder time sleeping with the tiny bit of pain so I gave him tylenol for his nap and then for bed.

His third tooth came in last month without me really knowing it. I do recall the daycare mentioning to me he's probably teething. I thought he just had allergies because he just had snot everywhere! But two weeks after the runny nose I was letting him chew on my finger like he always does and I happened to feel the third tooth It'd already broken through. So that wasn't much of a bother.

But now! his teething is really getting to him. It's not so bad now because the big one came through on Monday, but he's still a lot more fussy than normal. When he started having the runny nose again I was thinking there may be a tooth on the way. Then I had him laughing and the angle I was holding him allowed me to see his gums and to my horror I saw three spots where teeth were pushing against the gum on top. Add that to the other spot on the bottom where a tooth is biding its time from when the third one came in.

It's no wonder he's been so fussy and clingy lately. I can barely set him down at all. But two of the five have broken through and the next one appears to be the tooth to the left of the top front left tooth (that one is coming down as well but the top front right one is what broke through Monday).

I'll be glad when this is done and I have my content baby back. Well, as content as he normally is. He's a cuddle bug.

***

The past few days William has been staring at his hand again as it moves. I guess he's going to be right-handed We thought he could be left-handed but he's grown out of doing everything with his left, but we'll see. Well two days he started doing what looked like waving. I mean, it was a pretty good wave, if that's what it was, I wasn't sure. I don't know what the average age for waving is with kids. But then yesterday he did it some more and we figured it definitely was his wave. He doesn't do the open and close hand wave, he does the shake from side to side and it's very deliberate.

It's so cute and I was pretty much feeling like it wasn't fair that I and my family are the only ones who get to see it because while William doesn't have that fear of strangers, he does take a minute or two to warm up because he has to take them in first, especially men since he really only sees two men. Of course right after I mention this to my sister before taking William into the grocery store, I'm busy looking at oatmeal on the breakfast cereal aisle when this guy, maybe in his late twenties with what looked like his little brother, comes walking down the aisle. William sees him and waves at him, holding that arm out as the man passes by. This got a smile from the guy and he waved back. Then William proceeded to wave at almost anyone we passed.

And today, when I got to the daycare, he was playing with -ok this is kind of confusing but bear with me- my mom's friend's step-son's son who was sitting in this thing on the floor and William fell backwards (from his knees). He's just lying there on his back and he sees me and smiles and then waves at me.

I'm hoping this is the beginning of him being able to do sign language because I would love for him to quit whining at me during feeding and also be able to ask me for food or milk. I need to find some other signs, too. All the ones I remember from elementary school are for junk food but that's just what we were taught, haha!

***

William can crawl on his hands and knees but he still topples forward from time to time and when that happens he moves to the army crawl. He's begun following me to the bathroom or into the kitchen, laughing the whole way. But before he really started going fast, he began wanting to stand up. I've been dealing with him trying to pull himself up using the couch cushions while I'm trying to pump. The couch I have is awful for allowing a baby to pull themselves up so he get pretty aggravated. But he can use his walker to pull himself up or do it while in the pack n play at nana's.

So I looked and looked and finally someone was selling an activity table! Only $10! I just got it last night and he LOVES it! Though he hasn't realized he can use it to stand up himself. The most he does there is get to his knees and play or be really lazy and just sit and reach up.

I'm wondering when he's going to walk. I was nine months and so far he's keeping up with all my milestones as a baby.